This month on VH-1

Frampton Comes in a Hive!

Grammy Award Winning Beephiliac Peter Frampton risks life and reputation by losing his mess in – yes – a beehive. Viewers have a chance to win a jar of Frampton’s controversial man-bee honey.

Niggaz With Gratitude

MC Ren revisits his gym teacher Mr Melton Mowbray to thank him for giving the upstart Ren a chance in the greater Compton cross-country trials. In emotional exchanges, they address the controversy that followed Ren finishing 111th after stopping to kick a swan to death (“he was crip-walkin!”), and Ren freestyles over the sound of Mrs Mowbray preparing sandwiches. The swan’s family appear briefly, flapping and shit.

Plantera

Fans of Pantera grunt and roll round in dung, while the world’s leading botanists attempt to interpret whether they are trying to communicate something other than their appalling taste in music.